Is love the same as romance?

Are you in love with the idea of being in love?

We all have romantic ideas about what our perfect partner or perfect relationship should be like.

Our ideas are fuelled by films, t.v. programmes, magazines, we are also influenced by the relationships of our families and friends.

Sandra was on holiday with her friend Cathy, it was a  beach holiday. Sun, sand, surf, bronzed bodies, perfect setting for a holiday romance. And it happened, Nick and his mates camped on the sand next to the girls and things developed from there. Over the next 2 weeks Nick and Sandra spent a lot of time together, if they weren’t on the beach with the others they were out together drinking and going to clubs. Sandra was well and truly caught up in the web of a holiday romance. Cathy was enjoying her holiday, she spent time with Nick’s mates, she got to know some of their girlfriends, she made some new friends. Sandra only spent time with Nick, even when the others were around she couldn’t see them.

Two weeks passed quickly and Sandra and Cathy returned home. Nick and Sandra spoke on the phone and sent text messages, they planned to meet up again very soon. Sandra told everyone she met how wonderful the holiday had been, that Nick was the ONE, what they had was very special etc., etc.  However after several months, the frequency of the calls and text messages dropped off and Sandra couldn’t get Nick to agree a date when they would meet up. Poor Sandra had created a vision of the perfect romance.

Couple meet on beach, fall passionately in love, can’t wait to see each other again, meet again, he sweeps her off her feet and gives a diamond ring and sets the wedding day.  Except that that’s not quite how Nick saw it.

Couple meet on beach, it’s his home town he sees a lot of beach babes, summer is a great time for a young stud!  Two pale coloured chicks, obviously on holiday, both cute, one of them giving him the come on, go for it!  Nick is all about having fun, he is not about settling down, he is training to be a submariner and travel the world. He knows what he wants.  His short term happiness was enhanced by his encounter with Sandra.

Sandra is in love with a dream, she doesn’t really know what she wants to do with her life and she doesn’t really know Nick.  Her encounter with Nick fitted with her dream of how she would like her life to be, her happiness was dependent on the story working out according to plan.

Similar things can happen when you meet someone and then try to make them fit the picture you have of your ideal mate.  Much better to know what qualities you need in your ideal mate and with you shopping list in hand go out and find the best fit!  If you would like to know more about finding your perfect partner you’ll enjoy reading our ebook, ‘How to Improve Your Relationship”,

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