Are you being pushed around?

Stand up for yourself

Are you able to stand up for yourself or do you find yourself going along with what your colleagues, friends or family want just to keep the peace?

Standing up for yourself doesn’t have to be about arguing or causing bad feeling.

Many people live their lives to the beat of someone else’s drum, but never experience the thrill of dancing to their own tune.  What can you do?

I have written in depth about these strategies in my ebook, “How to Get Your Life Back”, here are some strategies that you might find useful.

Think before you commit.

People are very good at passing the buck and getting other people to carry the heavy loads, many aren’t even aware that this is how they operate!

If you find that you are juggling your time to accommodate other people it’s time to take a step back and look at what THEY are doing with their time before you allow them to make use of your time.

e.g.  “Oh, Hi, I’ve been looking for you would you be able to help me with, I’m just snowed under?”

Whoa…. Don’t leap in there saying yes and then worry about how you are going to fit it all in.

This is your new answer, “ I’m sorry to hear you are so busy, I’m pretty busy myself but I’ll check my dairy / schedule and see what I can do, I’ll get back to you later”.

Chances are by the time you get back to them they have managed to get someone else to do it, but  if not, you have had time to think about it and decide whether you can help or not.

This is how it goes,  “ Hi, I’ve just checked my diary, I’m very busy through today and tomorrow until around 3p.m., I may be able to give you 30 minutes then, provided nothing else comes up”.

The other person may not be happy, but why were they asking for your time in the first place?  Mostly because they haven’t planned their own time very well and need to offload some work to catch up.

Be strong, stand up for yourself, if they are not happy, too bad, just smile and say, I’d love to be able to offer you more but this is the best I can do.

If it’s your boss that is seeking to increase your work load at short notice, ask for her help to re-schedule and prioritise your work so that you can fit in this extra task.  It goes like this, “I’d love to help you out on that, would you just help me reschedule the work you gave me yesterday so that  I can do things in the best order that will allow me to get new task done for you”.

In each of these examples you make the other person aware that your time is just as valuable as theirs, that you have other commitments and that they can’t take it for granted that you will put yourself under pressure simply to make life easier for them.

If you have trouble standing up for yourself at work, with friends or family I suggest you invest in a copy of ‘How To Get Your Life Back’, not only will you learn how to stand up for your self, you’ll become more confident, better organised and happier!

Just follow this link and get your life back on track!

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