How to Make Friends

This really follows on from my last post about having fun. I’m sure you have noticed that people who laugh a lot are usually surrounded by other people. Yep, we all want to spend time with the fun guy.

Think about it, how do you feel after you have spent an hour with someone who moans about work, their partner, their kids, the state of the house?

Apart from laughing a lot people that make good friends are usually interested in other people, they want to hear about what you are doing and what you think. They share what they think and feel, but they will still respect your opinion. They don’t criticise you or other people, they spread their enthusiasm and good will around, mainly they say things that are upbeat.

People have different views of what friends are about, some folks expect their friends to be their counsellors, some expect that they will bale them out of any problem, some people look to their friends for company and to share common interests. We often make friends with people in the same line of work or who have the same hobbies.

I often hear people say, But I don’t have any friends, of course I’m too tactful to say “and who’s fault is that”, but that’s where I’m going, in a gentle sort of a way!

Making friends is about giving – not getting.  It’s about making people feel good about themselves.

You can find out how to do that in our 21 day course, there’s a section on “How to Make People Feel Like a Million Dollars”,

What can you give that will help you make friends?

  • Can you offer help with a particular task, e.g. do you enjoy gardening, painting, D.I.Y.
  • Can you volunteer for something, e.g. run a marathon, get to know others doing the same thing and train with them.
  • Join the Red Cross or St. John’s Ambulance. Volunteer at your local hospice.
  • Be the coffee maker at work, don’t just make for yourself, check to see who else might like a drink.
  • Invite a few people from work to your place to watch a film.
  • Whenever you get invited out, make sure you invite the person to something within the next 2-3 weeks.
  • Never pass up an invitation.
  • Help with fund raising for local groups.
  • Join a service club, e.g. Rotary, Lions, Inner Wheel, these are International organizations.

Making friends is most certainly about making other people feel good. Look for ways that you can give a compliment or encourage people, the spin off is that you’ll feel better and you’ll make some friends!

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